Friday, May 16, 2014


It has been a hell of a rollercoaster lately; physically and emotionally. I've realised that I am becoming someone that I know I have always been, but I didnt expect it to be so soon. I know I am like this, always had, but I cant believe it emerged already. Congratulations, you succeeded bro. Unleashed the Beast.

I have a talent in pretending, faking and hiding myself from the truth. Im an expert if i want to be, trust me. But most of the time, i would just say and show what i feel just to give a slight hint to those around just to see who's observing, who would concern and who would just ignore and dont give a shit. You can say its like a test or something but whatever. But all and all, i know i suck the world doesnt have to constantly remind me. But as pretty suck as I am, i know im better than a whole lot of people because i dont do and think the way some people do and who the heck cares. Selfish? Dont give a damn as long as what i am doing is right for me and right for a certain others than i dont think there'e anything wrong with it.

And i hate pretenders and fakers so effing much probably because i CHOOSE not to be fake and NOT to pretend even though i know i have the chance to. Just because im good at it, does that mean i HAVE to do so? NO !! Basically, the world does not revolve around you, you didnt even own it. so just STFU. In everybody's life, everybody is the main actor and everybody is important. You wont be thinking others is much more important in YOUR world right. Im not talking about family, siblings or any other closely related members that you will reject and refute on. Yes i know that. But tell me how many people wont think about themselves in every situation. Exactly. It is YOUR OWN freaking life. Why would you let others take the lead.You settle in for your own life.


Finished THE FAULT IN OUR STARS *fireworks* *confetti*  OMG I read. I actually read. Gosh i cant believe myself. Hahahahahaha *patting myself at the back* For me, its a good story. Different from others and the words written is simple and easy to read. Maybe thats why i get to finish it and didnt think it as a heavy book. My sister asked me which part makes me cry like hell (so what? can someone cry reading a book?) , well maybe i was just me; You know, for someone who didnt read much who came across an emotional-stirring book, of course i would cry. Compared to her. She reads everything of course she read something else that is more dramatic and heart-breaking. Duuuuuhhh ~

Oh there's this on time, in Biology class, we learned about cell and organelles and the whole thingnamajig, and i came across "Omnit cellular e cellular" or something like that. And i literally remembered it from that book. I mean, the first time i see that phrase is in that book and the next day, i learned it in class. Omg i was so hyped !! Hahahahaha i feel like Gosh, we really CAN learn something new when we read. HAHAHAHAHA well, i knew that already but that feeling . . . .

Okay? Okay.
The world is not a wish-granting factory.




I’m struggling to find you who I cannot see
I’m struggling to find you who I cannot hear
I see things that I couldn’t see before
I hear things that I couldn’t hear before
After you left me, I have grown a power that I didn’t have before
The selfish me who has only thought about myself
The me who didn’t know your feelings and ignored it
I couldn’t believe myself that I have changed this much
Your love can still move me like this
If I just think of you, I can fill this world with you
Because each snowdrop is one tear drop that belongs to you
But theres just one thing that I can’t do and it’s to make you come to me
I hope I don’t have this miserable power
The selfish me who has only thought about myself
The me who didn’t know your feelings and ignored it
I couldn’t believe myself that I have changed this much
Your love can still move me like this
Stopping the time, (I) go back to you
I open this book of memories and I open up your page
And in the book I’m in there, in there with you
The small and weak person, because of your love
Just like this for everything (my whole existence)
I changed the whole world
The me who didn’t know how to be thankful for love
The me who thought that the end was the end
To the image of you who wanted me to be, I fixed myself everyday
I think my love will continue on forever
Stopping the time, (I) go back to you
I open this book of memories and I open up your page 
And in the book I’m in there, in there with you
The things that I met that winter
I’m struggling to find you who I cannot see
I’m struggling to find you who I cannot hear



Sunday, March 9, 2014

Would You ?

If I could take away the pain and put a smile on your face
Baby I would, baby I would
If I could make a better way, so you could see a better day
Baby I would, baby I would, I would

Paint a doorway to the sky and hand you the keys,
Let you know that you're always welcomed so that you never leave
Buy you all those fancy things that you only see on tv, yeah
Run away, to our hideaway, we be living the american dream
And i, know it's never gonna be that easy
But I know that it won't hurt us to try

If I could take away the pain and put a smile on your face
Baby I would, baby I would
If I could make a better way, so you could see a better day
Baby I would, baby I would, I wouldWo-oh, wo-oh, wo-oh baby I would

To the love forever wide, so that it never runs dry
Anytime you ask me why I'm smiling, say that I'm satisfied
You got your flaws and so do i,
Past lovers that made you cry
And though I wanna make it right
I just cant read your mind

And i, know it's never gonna be that easy
But I know that it won't hurt us to try

If I could take away the pain and put a smile on your face
Baby I would, baby I would
If I could make a better way, so you could see a better day
Baby I would, baby I would, I would

Wo-oh, wo-oh, wo-oh baby I would

Yeah it's not about what I want
It's all about what you need
I know that he hurt you, but that wasnt me
And I know, and I know sometimes it's hard to see
That all we need to be

If I could take away the pain and put a smile on your face
Baby I would, baby I would
If I could make a better way, so you could see a better day
Baby I would, baby I would, I would

Sunday, October 13, 2013


Assalamualaikum and a very very very pleasant month. I know i've been a way for a really really long time and this blog is filled with cobwebs, spiders and heaps of dust. Since i've been busy lately with college, assignements and such, i dont really have time to update my blog. But who cares, no one reads this anywayyyy~

So, since i have the mood to talk about things, i though of updating on whats happening in my life. Basically, my final exams is just around the corner - about less than 2 weeks- yeahhhh and i havent really prepared. Since my midterm exam result is like the worst ever , i dont want to get the same result again. Buuuuut unfortunately, being a lazy and stupid kind of person, doing such thing takes a lot of effort. Urgh, i know that i shouldnt be like this, i know that i am the only person who could take action of my own intention but for me ding all of that is just frustrating and a lot harder than it seems. With all the assignments, tutorial that i have to submit, i literally have time just to finish all of that but not to revise or study.

While everybody else is practically pouring their hearts and thoughts out, studying passionately (i think) i am stuck im my own boring and dull life, trying to figure out what am i supposed to do. Everyone else seems so organised and planned everything out. Not to mention, they work so so hard and the all are just brilliant and intelligent like hell man ! Hmmmm ! so we'll just see how it goes.

For my love life, who am i kidding I DONT HAVE A LOVE LIFE TO TALK ABOUT...
Unless if its my love for my husband, Justin of course, who else. Then i could go on and on and on *Celine Dion's voice* My baby has release quite a number of new songs

Slave To The Rhythm (featuring THE MJ and when it comes to MJ you know its perfect. The king of pop ft the Prince of pop, now thats what you're talking about)


Twerk (feat Miley Cyrus aka Queen. Love this song especially his part when he says "Twerk it Twerk it" Omggoshhhhhh sexaayyyy)

Lolly MV ( Now this Mv i literally fangirled like crazy for a week atleast and kept on replaying this MV like there's no tomorrow. I still watch that video okayyyy. He is so adorable, hot and cute all at once. And the way he dance is just. I cant)

Heartbreaker (now this song is newly released and hit #1 on iTunes over 60 countries including Malaysia. And the fact that the local radio *shout out to FLY.FM* plays this song. omgoshh this song is ore personal than ever as he lets us in :) so basically, this song is technically for selena but who cares, this song is a masterpiece.Everybody likes it, even the non-beliebers. What else can i say?)

All That Matters (this song aint release yet, but i heard that its an r&b song and its about me *ehem beliebers but i still wanna pretend that its about me* *flips hair* CANT WAIT!! And since its for #MusicMondays, i have to wait for tomorrow afternoon for it to be release as by then it wold be Sunday Midnight in the US)

So there's a lot to come as the #MusicMondays will be going on for 10 weeks. the perfect way to end the year i have to say. And there will be #FilmFridays for sneak peeks and previews as well as trailers for #Believe3D WHICH WILL BE OUT ON CHRISTMAS :) That means for Malaysia aka Narnia it will be released maybe early next year.

So yeahhhh, thats it for now :) Be sure to check out my twitter, instagram, facebook at all the other craps i got *bajet famous je aku ni* Laterrrr peeps :)


Friday, July 19, 2013

Ramadan Is BACKKKK !!


Yaaaaayyy !! As all of us are aware it's RAMADAN :)) *blow up the fireworks*  So this year its a bit different as im experiencing it in a slightly different environment. All these years i've spent it at my high school but now . . .  imma big girl oredy. Spending it at INTEC with new friends and some old friends :)) Being in college is kinda cool because i can go home like almost every weekend. So this year i get the chance to break fast with my family even more compared to the last 5 years. 

So speaking of college, you have no idea how INSECURE i feel. I mean everybody there speaks english like so so so fluently and i really held back because i felt so insecure about it. Not because they're good, it's because of ME. I'm not THAT GOOD. so i stutter and mumble a lot. Yes i can speak a little but to some of them (i can guarantee if you were in my place, you'll understand) most of them are so good that they did'nt even sound Malaysian. My jaw literally drops whenever i hear them speak. Hogoshhhh ~ And also i fell asleep during one of my diagnostic test for IELTS and BAMMMM got the lowest in class for that!! Douche ive never ever get the lowest for reading. Like ever !!  So it seems like i have to improve my speaking skills. And not to forget read MORE :"(( I dont wanna get that kind of marks ever again. I wanna be a serious competitor to my classmates.



Sunday, July 7, 2013


ALOHAAAA ~ Hey there. I know what you all gonna say "WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?" "WHY HAVENT YOU UPDATE THIS BLOG?" bla bla blaaa ~~ well, all of you are aware that i am so so so LAZYYYY with doing things that i don't want to do at a certain time, so there you go. There's my answer. HAHAHA~ naaaah just kidding. I was busy with COLLEGE and stuff so i haven't got the proper time to actually sit and type :P

Back to the topic, as you can see on the tittle above *pointing my fingers to the title* I have several things that i listed to be on my BUCKET LIST and also my WISH LIST. Since most of these things that i listed need MONEY  $$$   i guess it will take forever for me too make it happen. 

Let me just give you what i listed :

 1) Meet Justin Bieber before i die
 2) Be to his concert. Any concert even though only once
 3) Meet & Greet
 4) Go to UK to meet Jack, Finn, Caspar, Zoe, Marcus, Alfie and all of my favourite Youtuber
 5) Go to Old Trafford and watch Man Utd play
 6) Have my dream wedding
 7) Has a boy as my first child and twins (okayyy i know it isnt time yet but i sure want this to happen)

1) iPhone
2) Beats
3) Merchandises
4) The Key perfume
6) More sneakers and creepers and boots !!

Well here are some of my BUCKET LIST and my WISH LIST !!

As you can see on my WISH LIST, i highlighted number 5. So today, i wanna tell you all about it ! I started to know this penny board since last 2 years i think, since i know JACK and FINN. And ive been dying to have them ever since !! But the problem is, IT IS DAMN PRICEYYYY !! IT'S TOO EXPENSIVE. JUST LIKE M&G TIX, PERFUMES AND OTHER STUFF. I CANT AFFORD IT :'(((((and it hurts knowing that i cant have what i want.

Yes i may not know how to ride this but who care. I wanna learn a new skill and this is one way to do so! Im saying YES to things and want to try something new :) 


This penny board comes in 2 types; the Classic 22" penny board and also the Nickle 27" penny board. Each board has different coloured decks and wheels. Which makes it so so so cool !!

PASTEL LOVERS ??? Well, here's something for you :) Aren't these gorgeous ????? This is like a show stopper !!!!!!!!! Aaaahh cant get my eyes of these :))

They have patterned ones too :)

OH BOYYYY !! I REALLY REALLY WANT ONE OF THESE !! This penny board is originated from Australia which makes the price of one CLASSIC penny board RM 440-510 and NICKEL RM 480-550 here in Malaysia !! And even more expensive for the patterened, marble, and pastel penny board !! 

Seems like i have to starve myself in order to save money to buy this !!!!! But at the same time, im saving for M&G . So can you see my dilemma here right now ?? Goshhhh ~~ 


Friday, May 31, 2013

Vacayyy @ Tioman Island

Assalamualaikum and hellooooo everybody !! Since i havent update my blog for so long, i decided to do it before it vanishes into thin air !!!
So as you can see on this blog title, my family and i went to TIOMAN ISLAND for 4 days and 3 nights ~ it was so much fun. Despite the long driving and ferry delays, everything else was awesome !! 

On the first day, we arrived late in the evening so went to the beach :) I watched the sunset and took some snaps :) Danish and Afrina went swimming at the beach

The next day i had my first snorkeling experience ever. Well to be honest, i wasnt planning to do it because of some issues (one particular issue to be specific) but i decided to go anyway. Eventhough my clothing were unsuitable but who the heck cares. I think im the first person ever to snorkel with JEANS and SHAWL (siap ade pin bunga2 lagi~ ) But it was one great experience. We fed the fishes and oh myyy it was amazing !! It was so much fun to see the fishes swarming to eat the bread :) And while i was snorkeling i brought along the bread and fed the fishes and it felt like im living in the ocean together with the fishes :) it was so so pretty. There are so many species of fish and it was beautiful !! There's this species of fish that is so colourful !!

The next day we went to another beach in KG JUARA, a waterfall and went snorkeling again at another place called the "Taman Laut Pulau Tioman". Just so you know, The beach at KG JUARA is the most prettiest beach in Tioman Island.

On the last day, we bought some CHOCOLATES from a DUTY-FREE shop and some souvenirs. I got myself a cool T-SHIRT !! The journey back home was tiring but i dont mind at all :) One of my best vacay ever :))